Will you take a quarter for that?

Garage Sale.  Yard Sale.  Tag Sale.  Rummage Sale.  Junk Sale.

Whatever you call it, it’s the same thing:  Putting all my junk treasures out for some other fool to take home.

My 1st question is this:  Who decided these things should start at the Ass Crack of Dawn?  6:00 am?  Are you freakin’ kidding me?  How about 9:00?  Doesn’t that make MUCH more sense.

Apparently not, because people start pulling in the driveway before the sun even begins to break through.  I’ve barely managed to get dressed and have my teeth brushed – forget makeup and any hair combing.

And these people are ruthless….for God’s sake, the little piece of shit you want is only a quarter, do you have to try to get it cheaper?  What do you want it for, a dime?  Sure, that piece of Princess House might only be worth a dime to you, but I paid $27 for it….20 years ago.  Surely by now it’s worth AT LEAST A FRIGGIN’ QUARTER!!!!

I worked for a solid week gathering up all the crap treasures around the house that I wanted to sell to make LOTS of money and clean out the house.  I priced ‘to sell’ and organized it by category for the ease of the customer.  I even went to the bonus room and dug through old worn out vintage clothes, sure women everywhere would  want to refresh their winter wardrobe.

I laid out all my goodies and waited patiently while hoards of people pawed through my pristine display of treasures, positive that they were simply deciding which purchase to make.

So Many Treasures…

I waved and said “Thanks for stopping by” like these were old friends just over for a visit.

I bought a cup of lemonade from The Tater (who made $7 from all those people who ‘browsed’ my treasures!), thinking that Crystal Light really wasn’t all that great when it’s watered down, in a dirty styrofoam cup that might have rolled around on the ground at least once.

At 11:00, I decided I needed a nap and my Yard Sale was officially over.  I made $47.25.

Next time I’m starting at 9:00 and selling margaritas.


  1. Last time I did a “Garage Sale”, people tried to take things past the “Do Not Enter” areas, and one group stuffed a bag full of clothes, and stole them while I was talking to someone else… Never again…


  2. UGH. I have so much stuff to get rid of and I’m DREADING doing the yardsale thing. The last time I did one it was for charity and there were like 6 of us participating. We made a good amount of money for Relay for Life. When I do it solo for my own clearing out and small profiting? Yeah, I’ll be lucky to make a 10 spot.
    Loved this post!!


    • Don’t we collect tons of crap and then for some reason, we don’t want to get rid of it. And then when we do, suddenly the value decreases greatly, just to get it out the door. It’s always more fun with lots of people…as long as you don’t buy more than you sell 🙂


  3. My Mom LOVED yard sales and every Saturday morning we’d be up at the crack of dawn GOING to them…I HATED it 🙂 Now? If I could make more than $47 then I’d LOVE to have one all the time ~ and yes…just give me the damn quarter, please!


  4. oh gosh, how I remember those Friday and Saturdays that my mom would throw these garage sales and how I would HATE having to get up and help. It would make her so angry when someone made the comment “you have this stuff marked way too high” when pants were marked .50. Good memories, good memories. Thanks for making me think of them!


  5. I think urban-dwellers will usually buy more stuff and pay more for it than suburbanites …and then there’s the increased density of potential buyers


  6. hi – funny. I helped a friend this past weekend with her moving/yard sale here in the heart of the city of Chicago. She made over $2000.00! Now, I know that’s what you wanted to hear, right? She had some good stuff–trunks, a bike, some chandeliers, and lots of crap. And you’re right, people want it for less even if it’s a quarter. Crazy. I was a hot salesman, wouldn’t let anyone leave without buying something. It was good fun.


  7. in england we call this a car boot…normally we all go to a big feild and sell our treasures..from the back of our car…the only thing is..u cant resist going around and looking at other peoples treasures,,specially the children,they tend to bring things back…..


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