I Got This

We live in the country and have 2 large, outside dogs. They have a beautiful space to romp, play, chase and do whatever the hell dogs do.  This is their set up:

1 fenced acre, surrounded by giant trees for lots of shade cover

a duplex for housing

a covered area for food and water

a couch

a fire hydrant (no shit – and just in case you don’t believe me, here it is!)

See, a fire hydrant and the upper part of their digs







I tell you this so you won’t think we’re bad animal parents.  And just to further prove my point, here’s a picture of Cooper…..looking really abused, unloved and uncared for…

That’s not THE couch they have outside ~ the one they have they’ve managed to eat all the stuffing out of but it’s still out there for PLAYTIME!!!









Now  you can appreciate the next part of the story.  They (we also have a german shepherd) were in the pen and had been digging out, under the fence.  While they always come back home, we don’t want them to get hit or terrorize any small children while we’re away so this had to stop.  NOW.

However, they are escape artists.  They dug  under, around, through and over the fence….they MEAN to get OUT.

I came home and they greeted me in the driveway, dirty, wet and happy to have roamed to places unknown.  So I put them back in the pen where they happily lapped up their shady water and rested under the trees.  I’m sure they were planning their next escape.

I was sure I could fix the fence, after all I’d done it lots of times.  Pick up cinderblock, carry cinderblock 1/2 mile to the pen, place cinderblock over hole until Mac gets home.  See, nothing to it.

I didn’t even bother changing out of my dress because I GOT THIS!  I am WOMAN, Hear me ROAR.

I pick up Mac’s gloves on the way to the barn, (cause I don’t wanna get my hands dirty-geez!) and pick up the 1st cinderblock.

Yuck, wormy things.  I drop that one, sure the next one WON’T have worms.  Even though they are directly beside each other….rational?  Perhaps not.

Turns out the next one didn’t have worms…..I picked it up, started carrying it and began to feel the stinging of bees….on my ribcage….under my dress…multiple times!

I did what any rational woman would do in these circumstances….ripped my dress right off ~ standing in the yard, in full view of whoever happened to be nearby.  I DID NOT CARE.  Those little bitches were stinging the hell out of me.

And like a REAL WOMAN, I carried that cinder block the mile (of course it was farther away since I was carrying it in bra and panties with bee stings – COME ON!) to the dog pen, threw it down and dared, DARED the dogs to try to dig through a cinder block on my watch.

Then I went inside and cried a little.

I hate to report there are no actual pictures of me carrying the cinderblock to the pen in my bra and panties….at least that I know of. I did see my neighbor later and he was REAL friendly….hmmm…..


  1. oh..wow,,,oyou are amazing..the worms got me… i wouldnt be carry any thing after that,,as for bees sting ing me id have to retire to my bed….to be waited on…yes i know a big softie and id milk it as well


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s