Bah Humbug.
Well not really. But I’ve seen posts from my friends (I’m not really sure these people can actually BE my friends…) for the past 2 weeks with words like, “2 down, 6 more to go!” or We just got our 1st tree up ~ the others will go up tomorrow. Decorations begin!!! Yeah!!!”
And I just gotta tell ya…I’ll be lucky if I have ONE tree up the week before Christmas and there are 20 leftover, child-made, half broken, mis-matched, torn up ornaments on there by midnight on Christmas Eve.
I’m not really Ebenezer Scrooge ~ I don’t hate Christmas. I really do love the holidays, the family, the joy and fun and all that goes with it. I’m just really terrible at decorating (we’ve been in the house for 15 years and I STILL don’t have curtains in the upstairs hall) ~ and Pinterest just ain’t helping me AT ALL. I mean, THIS is what I find when I search for Christmas Decorations???
And let’s face it…it’s a WHOLE lotta work. You have to find all the boxes and boxes of stuff from last year and sort thru it to see what isn’t broken. Then you have to bring it to wherever you’re gonna decorate. You have to unload it, decide what to use, decorate with it and then move the boxes somewhere…..
… and I’ve always wondered about the whole decorations thing. What the hell do you do with all the other stuff when you put the Christmas decorations out? Do you just pile Christmas decorations on top of the regular, year-round decorations? Or do you pack up all the regular year-round stuff, store it somewhere and put the Christmas stuff out, only to have to swap it back out again in a month?
Lemme tell ya…I did that one year and am STILL looking for the pictures I packed up. Yeah ~ no.
So back to the whole decorating thing….I would love to spend hours and hours decorating my tree, my house, my yard and myself. However, even if I did spend hours doing any of those things, it would still look like Charlie Brown and Cindi Lauper had a baby and that baby decorated my house.
Sorta like this…
So I might be a little bit jealous of all those fabulous trees in every room, perfect bows on every door, matching presents under the tree and a delicious meal on the decorated table (with matching tablecloth, runner AND placemats). They are absolutely gorgeous.
Or, in a few weeks, I might just put in my Christmas CD, turn on the lights on my little tree (dammit, I forgot the lights!!!) and fix some wieners in the Crockpot and a margarita….cause that’s how I roll!
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Thanks for reading my blog ~ if you want to leave a comment, I promise I’ll read it and respond because I LOVE comments. And if you really love it, share it with your friends and have a margarita while you’re reading the blog out loud. At the bar. With other people near by. It’s even FUNNIER then! 🙂 Cheers!
Lipstick, Margaritas and Hairspray 
I wont put my tree up until Friday but I have such an easy way to do it. Now that my kids are grown I have a smaller tree–ALREADY DECORATED- that I wrap and keep in the attic until Black Friday! I do decorate the main rooms in the house but this makes things easier.
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Tresa ~ That is SOoooo what I want to do, but nothin’ doing with Mac…real tree, real tree, real tree…it’s like a mantra for him – ha!
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Well hell y’all why don’t we just nip this in the ass and hire them Kmart Jingle Ball boys to decorate our tress for us?!! It’d be like our very own grown up Elves on Shelf!! I think I’ll drink to that one myself!!
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Kassie ~ that sounds like a plan 😀 Cheers!
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Christmas is my favorite time of year its only me and the hubby most the time so we don’t do a whole lot small dinner few decorations he does the lights on tree I decorate.. this year we moved and in the mix we have lost the middle part of the tree soooo we decide to get a real one and I love it but its messy lol and of course our topper is in storage sooo I put a bow on top this year lol not so organized I guess just when with the flow thank goodness for rum and coke to ease the anger issues I was having lol sorry for the long story I wrote 🙂
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Alice ~ Girl, no worries cause I do love a story! And yes, rum and coke is great to ease any issues ~ Cheers!!
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Amen to all that and pass the margaritas… 🙂
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Oh Yeah Carla! Cheers 😀
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I’m with you, Sasha!! I am doing good if I get the freaking tree up and a few wrapped gifts under it…thanks for bringing me a laugh every day. Cheers to ya, girl!!
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Shelby ~ Don’t ya know it 🙂 Wrapped gifts???? Dammit, I gotta wrap, too 😀 Cheers!
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You have made my day! I really thought I was the only one.
I do have little Christmas towels I hang over the regular ones, and Target has some neat little rugs I put on the floor. My husband usually manages to get the lights up the week of Christmas, and take down in Feb. My kids put up my plug in tree (no messing with lights!) and decorate it. Just thinking about it makes me want to change my spiced coffee creamer to spiced rum.
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Vicky ~ I hear ya girl….I’m gonna start the Margaritas tonight ~ and just think about it a little bit longer…. Cheers!
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Since we live in a five pound house with fifty pounds of crap in it we just threw a string of lights on the ficus tree we brought in for the winter and called it a day. The tree died this year so I’m pretty sure christmas decor will be negligible this year. Funny thing is, I know there are at least three, and probably more, trees in all the crap we have.
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Rider ~ I have seriously thought about throwing lights on this dying cactus we have….I know there would be no cats or kids bothering them ~ Ha! And yep, I usually find exact replicas of the stuff I bought already in the boxes upstairs…the worst is those damn ornament wire hangers…I buy a box every year and now have approximately 47,000…..
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One year we left the tree up for six months. The day after we took it down, we asked ourselves, “why didn’t we just leave it up for the rest of the year?” LOL
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Michelle ~ excellent question!!! Ha ~ You could have a Valentine’s Tree, St. Patricks Tree, Easter Tree, Memorial Day Tree…..hey! I am seeing a new tradition here….. 😀
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We have lights for every holiday, why not trees? 🙂
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Michelle ~ works for me….I could get an artificial one, and just keep changing the name…valentines day, st. patricks day, easter…. 😀
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I’m right there with you! Can’t muster the strength to climb the sweltering stairs in my garage and pull 80 boxes of crap I don’t even want! What do I do with it when it’s from my mothers house that we all grew up with but it’s just plain ugly? Memories? Call me scrooge, but the next tree I decorate, I’m putting it in the pool shower and closing the curtain. Just slide her in! Cheers!
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Lori ~ Oh I KNOW! Some of those ornaments are 20+ years old and yep…FUGLY! I have thought about buying one of the stores decorated trees, totally decorated and just putting a trash bag over it and leaving it decorated the entire year ~ works for me! Cheers!
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I think when things aren’t perfect are when they are at their best. It makes for great memories. I have a picture of a real live mouse in my Christmas tree. Present from the cat, I thought it was dead, it wasn’t. Major chase thru the tree, mouse won. Every once in awhile thru the night this mouse would sneak out on a branch and taunt us. Never did find it afterwards-lol.
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Terrianne ~ Oh how hilarious! I would have freaked the hell out ~ the whole tree might have had to come down ~ WOW! Thanks cat!
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OMG Sasha, It’s only 5:00 in the morning and I snorted! Thanks for the laugh!
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Carynn ~ snorting at any time of the day is a good thing 😉 You’re welcome!
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I am standing over here in the Amen Corner singing Amen as loud as I can, dear. We put up ONE tree! One! I set up the Nativity scene and my husband and son like to hang twinkling icicle lights on the house. We put a wreath on the door and a bow on the mailbox. That’s it. End of decorations. And now that image of Charlie Brown and Cyndi Lauper having a baby has me looking for some bourbon for my coffee.
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Susan ~ AMEN, Girl, AMEN! And bourbon in your coffee is ALWAYS a good idea! Cheers!
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Sasha-I love you (in a non gay ass way)
You really know how to make me laugh every single time!! It’s always great to know I’m not alone on this decorating thing!
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Kassie ~ Totally didn’t take in a gay ass way – lol! Oh, girl, I see so many posts with absolutely beautiful trees and decorations and I think, NOPE, not gonna happen!! Cheers!
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I live where it it is dark so much of the day and night..that I love the lights..I feel like a flipping moth…so the main part of my Xmas season is lights, chocolate and hot buttered rums…I need to get a cat and some tinsel..I like the thought of a cat walking around with that tiny shiny light on its butt..light..oh light where for art thou light…on the cats butt..right..follow that cat..!
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Caroline ~ I really do love the lights, too ~ and if I had someone else to put them on, take them off, store them and get them out of the upstairs bonus room, I’d have about a million on there! And that damn cat! Ha ! Cheers!
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Thank you so much for making me laugh EVERY day! Charlie Brown and Cindi Lauper… LOL!!
I totally agree with you!
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Susie ~ you are Welcome! Thanks for reading what I write 🙂 Cheers Girl!
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That’s how I roll too!!!
Cause,in my way of thinking,Charlie Brown OVER~decorated!!!!
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Gloria ~ he had his moments!! And if it was just me in this house, there would just be some pine scented candles 😀
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I’m like you. I work my butt off to live paycheck to paycheck. Who the hell can afford all the decorations and extra trees? I just find myself hoping every year that the cats don’t take up residence in the damn thing and eat all the tinsel. Tinsel eaten by a cat is just one of those gifts that keep on giving if you know what I mean. That flash of sparkle coming out as the cat walks away just gives my boys the giggles. Thanks. I’m not the only one who doesn’t have time to put in all that work to decorate my whole house. I have better things to do…..who’s pouring?
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Jennifer ~ I’ll be pouring EVERy DAY! And I have a picture somewhere of my cat in my tree….very high up in the tree, too. And yes, the gift that keeps on giving! Cheers 😀
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Thanks for making me feel like I’m not the only inept and just slightly too busy mom to be Martha already. Best line of the whole ramble though is “Charlie Brown and Cindi Lauper had a baby and that baby decorated my house.” It’s how my house is decorated and looks every day, not just at Xmas and you know what, I’m ok with that cuz like you, I’m happy and my house is full of love!
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yep ~ it’s pretty much the way it is all the time 🙂 And I’ll never never ever be Martha, not even if I tried really really hard so I’m just fine with the way it is, too ~ cheers!
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